Day 10 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

It's two days after christmas. Let the "after the holiday" depression set in. Nope. You still have New Year's Eve and day to look forward to. I bet you read that and thought "oh, you know what? you're right. I do feel less happy after the holidays" and felt a little blue, but then I reminded you that there was New Year's to look forward to. And now you are excited. Very excited. Maybe you'll kiss someone on the mouth while the ball drops and you'll feel extra tingly or whatever. Oh, shut up. The idea of that made you feel good.

Okay, I went from doing this every day to a few times per week to whenever I feel like it. So much for a 30 day challenge of writing. I've been writing other things, so I've been busy. Okay, on with it.

Day 10 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

I've got a whole list of places that I'd like to visit, for specific reasons. I can't really imagine moving anywhere, it seems to permanent. I might have to learn a language or change my whole life just to exist somewhere that is different from here. It seems like a lot of work for the same place with a different view. That's why you visit and don't move. Okay, sit back and read my shitty opinions.

1. Belgium - Seems a bit under the radar, You probably won't be bumping into tourists left and right, you never hear anything bad about the people there. They are not cutting off heads and rolling them down stairs. It seems very quaint. Apparently, they make great chocolate, are known for waffles which are delicious, and make their own style of beer which I enjoy consuming. I feel like I could make myself feel quite at home there. Seems like utopia. Everyone probably wakes up and overloads and indulges in the big three that I just mentioned, go to work, nap, indulge again and call it a day. That's perfect. I've never been there but I feel it in the sole of my shoes that I could probably move there, despite the language and culture barrier.

2. Spain - I took some Spanish in high school and college. It would be fun to put it to the test. The ladies over there seem pretty. The sun shines there too. I've heard that they have some nice beaches and even though I sunburn like a piece of bread in a toaster, I give them a shot. I wouldn't go to a bull fighting match, but I would like to see the running on the bulls, which is a bunch of morons trying to outrun a stampede of bulls. You know a bunch of people are getting banged up and I would enjoy watching that happen.

3. Ireland - It seems like a whole mess of people live there. They have these people called pikes or pikies that are a lot like gypsies. I've seen on youtube that they fight a lot and make videos calling each other out. They are also door to door salesmen of whatever bootleg items they probably stole or bartered. It could be a strange thing to witness. But aside from that, I'd love to golf there in the greenest of green places.

4. Amsterdam - If I'm 40 and I have nothing going on in my life, I'm going there and just getting crazy.

5. Peru/South America in general - I want to see Machu Pichu real bad. It should be on the top of the list actually, but I am too afraid as a young white person to go to south america. I think they would get the idea that I might be worth kidnapping, which I'm not, or just humorously worth killing. People seem to go to those places and just turn up missing. I'm not really into disappearing yet.

Aside from that France can kiss my ass. Asia is weird, I'd need a guide of some sort. Africa could be fun, but again, I'd need a guide. They rest of Europe seems like a blur and smearing of itself which doesn't seem enticing to visit.

Work off those extra LBS that you gained.
Jack

Day 09 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.

Forgot about yesterday and I was tired... I don't need to explain anything to you.

Today is Thursday, December 22nd, 2011. Two days left of Christmas shopping. Get out there bitches.

Day 09 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up. I have a lot of stand-up comedy on here, so I'll do 15 tracks. Most of this stuff, I've never listened to and didn't know existed. If I can, I'll attach some sort of memory with it if such a thing exists. I recently took all my friends illegally downloaded music and put it on my computer so I probably don't know any of it yet.

1. Aziz Ansari - "Sheets" from Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening
Aziz brings attention to the fact that companies that make sheets lie about thread count.

2. Conor Oberst and The Mystic Valley Band - "10 Women" from Outer South
Very mellow.

3. Bill Cosby - "The Difference Between Men and Women" from Bill Cosby is a Very Funny Fellow Right!
Bill Cosby is really old. His comedy, even though it dates back to 20 years ago, is still somewhat relevant. This bit especially. He talks about how women go to the bathroom together but men would never do that. True. It's a weird concept of going to the bathroom together.

4. B.B. King - "Hummingbird" from Why I Sing The Blues
Forgot that I had this. A relaxing tune. Anyone Remember when B.B. King was doing Burger King commercials? What a sellout.

5. Eminem - "Drips" from The Eminem Show
I never listened to this album once. The radio songs "Soldier," "Cleanin out my closet," and "Superman" were on this one. I obviously didn't pay for this cd and more than likely will never listen to it. That aside, this track is about boning dirty whores. I wonder what happened to his daughter Hailie. Bet she's a dirty whore.

6. Bo Burham - "I'm Bo Yo" from Bo Burnham
Clever, young comedian that made it big from youtube. Everyone should check out his stand-up special. Entertaining as fck. With lyrics like "I'm offensive and creative like handicapped porn." and "Haters call me gay, but that ain't hatin'.'Cause im not homophobic, my morals are straight, And if I'm in the closet, then you are below me, Taking the B-A-T out of basement, homey" you are sure to laugh.

7. Blink 182 - "Go" from Blink 182
Never listened to this before. I only listened to the Blink 182 cd that was popular when I was in junior high. Blah.

8. New Found Glory - "It Never Snows In Florida" from Nothing Gold Can Stay
Well, again. Junior high. Kind of embarrassed to have this and Blink 182

9. Johnny Cash - "Where The Soul Of Man Never Dies" from Unearthed disk 4?
His cover of NIN's Hurt is really good. His last cd was super depressing knowing he is dieing.

10. Big D and the Kids Table - "Those Kids Suck" from The Gypsy Hill
This is turning into the ghost of Ross's music past. Early high school? What's up?

11. Incubus - "Under My Umbrella" from Morning View
This is somewhat of an album that has many memories attached to it. When I started my crappy high school band my drummer was a giant Incubus fan at the time and I got into them as well. Great album. Reminds me of summer on Nantucket, the band, and going to see them was my first big concert. I went to see them at Umass Amherst and little did I know, I would spend my undergraduate career there. It was a weird coincidence.

12. Chris Rock - "The Government Hates Rap" from Cheese and Crackers
This is a ridiculously funny stand-up set. He is a master of comedy.

13. Smoke or Fire - "Melatonin" from This Sinking Ship
Recently looked them up after the guy from Smoke or Fire was on a split acoustic album from Brendan from The Lawrence Arms. It's decent.

14. Alkaline Trio - "Your Neck" from Crimson
Good band still. One of the few bands that I still listen to from when I was younger.

15. Muse - "Stockholm Syndrome" from Absolution
Great song. Great cd. Discovered them when I went camping with my friends a few years ago. Was a great time.

That concludes ipod on shuffle. I have to go now because I still have to do Christmas shopping.

Day 8 - Bullet your whole day.

So, basically, if I do this three times a week I'm calling this a success. I am often busy, and more often lazy. That is that.

This one is easy. I've been awake for a while now, so I'll also catalog what I've already done.

Day 8 - Bullet your whole day.

3:30am - Woke up. I went to bed really early yesterday.
4:30 - Had Wheaties
5:00 - Watched a global warming documentary. One of the best I've seen. It's called "Cool It." It shows where our spending on global warming goes and what better ideas are out there to spend the money on.
7:00 - Started writing this
9:00 - Shower
10:00 - Bank
10:30 - Return library book "Four Hour Body." Highly recommend it.
11:00 - Start Christmas shopping
Grab Gift - a $15 item of some sort
Ron - Gift card to Old Navy
Parents - ?
Cousin Nick - ?
2:30pm - Nap
4:30 - Dinner
5:30 - Help mother bake for Christmas
7:30 - Lounge (Maybe blog again)
8:30 - Train
10:00 - Work till 4am? 5? 6? 7?

That's all folks

Day 07 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

Hey dogfaces, its another post from your favorite coffee enthusiast, Jack Dalton.

This 30 day thing was worst best idea someone else ever gave me. Just saying.

Okay, let's go.

Day 07 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

Well, this one for, I think a lot of people would mention a milestone in their life. Mainly because I think those milestones indicate a step toward the next level of something. A closing of one chapter in their life and starting a new one, which may mean they stopped wearing diapers and switched to pull-ups or something. So, I think I'll mention one of those and something else as well if I can think of something by the time I finish writing my milestone moment.

For my "moment of feeling satisfied with my life" milestone, I would have to say graduating from college. I know it sounds cliche. I hope everyone imagines a bunch of sweater-vest wearing assholes throwing their caps in the air and giving lots of hugs and smiling, but it was only sort of like that. I didn't see too many sweaters cause it was really hot that day, I actually got a draining sunburn. They were some hugs, okay, a lot of hugs and pictures and shit, but there were very, very, few cap throwings. From what I saw, I think I was the only one. I guess everyone wanted to keep their caps and look into their closets everyday and see that cap sitting there and think "the good ole days" and sigh as they got dressed for their real life jobs. But not I. I frisbee'd that thing as hard as I could. Why would I want to hold onto that crap? So, I unfortunately had to take pictures after hatless and sunburnt.

But to be clear, my real feeling of satisfaction came from when I was a few pages left from finishing my final paper. I happened to finish it early and I still was like F this thing. Who cares, right? This is the last hurdle and it going down. So, I got a big glass of whiskey and just typed away thinking this is DONE. I felt like a straighter version of Leonardo Dicaprio on the Titanic when he yells "I'm king of the world!" Only, I facebook'd "I'm going to Africa to get trampled by raging elephants!" It seemed more fitting. One person actually replied, inquiring if I really was going to Africa. And of course I didn't.

My nonmilestone feeling of satisfaction came from buying my first car with my own money. I say this is a nonmilstone moment, because until that point I was already driving one of the family vehicles when I was allowed to, so it didn't feel like when I got my license which would be a milestone. I was a bastard and insisted on buying a car before the summer and I couldn't drive it that summer because I went away to work. This piece of shit was a Pontiac Trans Am, which are only owned by morons who think they are living in the 80's. And when I got back from the summer, I drove this thing for a couple of weeks feeling like a bad ass. I had my jean jacket on and my candy cigarettes, and my transition lens shades (not actually). This was until the car started sounding like a running lawnmower hacking away at a pile of chains. For a few days, I still drove this thing because I was determined to not let the dream of owning a car die. I'm sure someone can relate with that one.

Day 06- Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality

So, I decided to take the weekend off and it turned into a long weekend. My only excuse was I forgot on Monday and was lazy on Tuesday. Luckily, I don't write anything important on this that people were hanging onto my every last word for. If I was the weatherman, you guys would probably be ripshit by now.

Day 06 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality

I have to address this because last year everyone got their shit in a bunch about this. Anyone remember the fake astrological sign that came out of nowhere? It was called Ophiuchus. Not sure if it was a real or fake but it through everyone's sign off by a few days and everyone was in a panic running to their bomb shelters waiting for the apocalypse. Nobody was sure how to behave anymore because a new sign was thrown in the mix telling them who to be. Does anyone really think that zodiac signs really indicate how a person behaves?

It's a whole bunch of nonsense.

I'm a Sagittarius, according to morons that believe in this hocus pocus. I Wiki'd Sagittarius to get some more wisdom on the subject and have come to reiterate my previous thoughts on the subject, which is this is dumb and wasting my time, but let's plow ahead, shall we? Wiki says, "The sign is governed by Jupiter, a planet which is symbolically associated with temperate qualities which loosen, relax and expand." I wish they would EXPAND on that. A planet of gas that is associated with a few vague terms controls the zodiac sign called Sagittarius. Wow, that was insightful. Do go on. "Sagittarians are reputed to be drawn toward travel (I don't travel. I'm afraid of different cultures) and philosophy (don't really enjoy too much 'by the book' Philosophy. I think it's a battle of the the largest vocabulary, really.), and to enjoy social contacts (I hate people), meeting new people (Especially new people) and exploring other cultures (Again, I'm afraid of different cultures). They are said to be highly intelligent (Correct), broad-visioned (Okay), tolerant in their views (mm hmm), mainly concerned with the "big picture" but with little patience for the details (Now, that's more like it)." How could this be soo wrong, yet, so right at the same time? Could it be that everyone varies just a little from their sign? Am I just a bit off? (Well, probably. I am sitting here writing this aren't I?) Or could it be that they say such vague shit that it applies to everyone? I mean, they were only right when they were telling me what I wanted to hear about myself. Doesn't everyone want to hear that they are intelligent, broad-visioned, tolerant in views, and getting the big picture? Yes, it made me feel like a champion. That's what they'll be saying at my retirement, and God forbid I say funeral. But the first stuff are things that I would wish about myself.

So to answer the question, my zodiac sign fits me when it says things I want to agree with. Ugh. I bet I sound like an angry teenager.

Anyway, zodiac signs are for killers.
That should be on a t-shirt.
J. Dalton

Day 05 - A picture of yourself and 20 interesting facts about yourself

The prompts for this 30 day challenge are exactly what they seem, stupid. I mean clearly this is an exercise for myself. There is nothing to really discuss but if you are reading this, you may want to try this one. I think a lot of people have such a hard time thinking about themselves in this way. I think it can be somewhat of a morale booster for all the kids out there. Some tend not to think of themselves as "interesting," but we all have some things. Other people can probably point these out to you, but to think of them yourself tends to be a bit more difficult. It shouldn't be that way considering nobody knows you better than you, right? Well, this writing is more of a list and self serving, so you can tune in tomorrow, or sit through this gossip girl bullshit. and away we go.

Day 05 - A photo of yourself and 20 interesting facts about yourself



1. Has Lymes Disease
2. Drinks coffee black
3. Worked at a McDonalds, Stop & Shop, Video Craze, two golf courses, Pita Pit, a printing shop, Sephora and public school system (possibly more places that can't be remembered)
4. Left-Handed
5. Ate first hamburger at the age of 18
6. Met Bill Bellicheck (spelling), Conan O'Brien (picture to prove it) and Jack Welch
7. Watched every episode of MacGyver and X-Files
8. Can beat Super Mario Brothers 3 without cheating
9. Once bench pressed 195lbs twice
10. Wore Saucony sneakers since age of 16
11. Got hit by a moving cop car
12. Broke nose in 2nd grade
13. Loves pizza
14. Brews beer
15. Never stole anything
16. Cats hate me
17. Took the last polaroid ever
18. Really good at fooseball
19. Never been in a fight
20. Carry a notebook

Day 04 - Recall a time when you thought of ending your life

Wow. This one is a bummer, right? To be honest, this hasn't happened. At the end of my worst days I remember I still have both arms and legs and a place to sleep. So life isn't that bad, right? Right!

Day 04 - Recall a time when you thought of ending your life

These prompts get more and more personal. Sweet Jesus. I will write about something we all can relate to. You are in class. You may or may not have prepared for it. But, today is the day. You have to give your presentation for the class. You haven't seen any other presentations yet, so you never knew what your competition was up to. To make the situation worse you are not presenting first.
Let me explain why not presenting earlier rather than later is worse. The teacher up until this point has yet to see what other students in your pool of peers have orchestrated for their presentations. And of course the overachievers are going first. They have handouts, a world-class power point presentation in 3D or whatever, an activity for the whole group to learn from, and a speech with no note cards. Their presentation is so damn entertaining that you forget that you have to go up. And once the presentation is over and everyone is finished cheering and throwing bouquets of flowers at the feet of someone that spent too much time researching the history of Mexico, the fear rushes back that at some point you will have to present yourself. And presenting near the end of the class everyone has presented and they are relieved and at ease which means they have a higher ability to pay attention to you when it's your turn. Which brings more pressure.
Then people get picked off one by one as you stare at clock. Presentation after presentation is just one big blur. You can not recall one thing that has been said in the last half hour cause you are fixated on your own impending doom. You are hoping by some miracle there won't be enough time for you to have to go up but know there will be. You are also hoping that somehow the teacher will just forget that you are a person in the class and skip you completely. And then, you think if an anvil was fall on your head, or if an arm fell off that you wouldn't have to do this. You are looking at your note cards with panic, knowing you have forgotten the pathetic 5 minutes of information you stole from Wikipedia. Could life get worse at that point? Anytime that I have to make a presentation is when I've thought of killing myself. It has never been over anything important.

Be safe out there.
Jack

Day 03 - Your views on religion

That last one was kind of serious, especially for a fun subject let's laugh through this one. Wait, it's on religion. Well, at least I am not religious

Day 03 - Your view on religion

(Watch me high school this intro.) Religion, as defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary, is "the service and worship of God or the supernatural." (Okay, I'm done high schooling)That being said, its harmless and okay by me. That is, until people get involved. People are by far the worst thing that ever happened to themselves. Everyone has their two cents about how everyone else should live and they are jamming these ideas down throats like quarters in an arcade game. More often than you think, they derive from religious beliefs. Even our higher ranking members of society, or at least ones that hold the most power, our politicians, stand firmly with their political beliefs - to the point where it impedes their ability to do the right thing for everyone. I'm not sure if that's what they really believe, or they are too afraid to not side with the book of the lord for public image. Like the polls don't speak for themselves.
People involved with religion also have sex with kids, most notably priests. That's the joke and the disgusting truth.
Religious organizations are a burden to the progress and social evolution in the world today. Religions, as an entity oppress the shit out of women, condemn the gays, and segregate the population as a whole. At what point do we say "this shit sucks" and drop our bibles in the dirt? Speaking of bibles, they were written too long ago be be relevant. They along with organized religions had to have been designed to keep people from running a muck. They outline these rules on what to do and what not to do based on some good principles. The parts that don't apply to us now, the way I see it, were set to over compensate for how crazy people were in the year 100 or whatever. Think of it this way (and I'm paraphrasing my good friend Doug Stanhope) if you were to walk into a used book store and stumble upon a bible without anyone knowing of its existence until you picked it up, how long could you read it until you said "this is stupid." And which would be more likely to happen, you stop reading it because of its inapplicable content to daily life, or say "hey, this is what I've been looking for."?
And what about Bob? - I mean God. Look, I do not know if there is a being greater than us, but considering the odds of living in a infinite universe, there may be, whatever it or they may be. I do feel as though there has to be some being greater than us. There has to be because we aren't so great. The only way that I think, and this is after me pacing the earth for 26 years, that we do see the man in the clouds is at death. Like at the end of a puppet show when the puppeteer comes out and we all clap and say "Great job, you creep. Get a real job." I say that in death we would meet this God figure because he certainly does not appear to be present in life. Take a look around. Things ain't so great in the world. Aside from dogs existing, everything needs a fixing.

I don't think I covered everything. But I've gone too far to look back. see you tomorrow, stupidheads.

Look up, and shake your fists (at God... because of famine and Katrina and the next Nicholas Cage movie and the one after that et cetera),
Jack

Day 02 - Your views on drugs and alcohol

Okay, so, today was supposed to be about "where i'd like to be in 10 years" but to avoid such a self-absorbed entry after the previous self-absorbed entry, I'll skip a day and probably go back to it at another time. Talking about myself all of the time can only get so interesting for a blog.

So here goes day 2

Day 02 - Your views on drugs and alcohol
Drugs and alcohol. Alcohol and drugs. Where to begin? This would have been a better discussion for yesterday in celebration for the prohibition repeal, but what's done is done.
Well, speaking generally, drugs can be both good and bad. Some are more dangerous than others, which is an issue, and people are not informed enough about them. So, these factors are contributors to the issues surrounding drugs. Government is not accepting enough to the idea of them, to the point where they do not allow testing of them, and so the population remains ignorant to their capabilities. We live in an uptight, fear motivating country.
I've been listening to the Joe Rogan Experience Podcast and after listening to many discussions on the topics of drugs, I have come to the conclusion that drugs, especially psychedelics, are more often abused because of the lack of knowledge of their effects. What advice could be given to those is to research anything before consumption and respect the process. What would be cool is if there were guides for these experiences much like in south america with ayawaska. It would be much safer, people would learn how much and what to consume and what the effects would be.
Weed is considered an issue by the government but in comparison to something like alcohol, it is significantly less harmful, though alcohol is legal. This is something that the potheads are in a huff about. I get it. I don't smoke weeds, but I would be just as upset is alcohol was illegal and pot was legal. Things are moving in the right direction for those people considering holding weed is now about as wrong as a parking ticket. One thing that I think is holding the US of A back from legalizing the marajawayway is taxation. Since alcohol and tobacco are taxed they are A-okay, even though they can be more addictive and many times over more harmful than weeds.
Alcohol is my only "drug" of choice. Nobody judges the occasional drinkers as much as the other drug users. What I've never understood is the alcoholics. I could never imagine just drinking heavily everyday. Do they not dehydrate? What's the deal? People that smoke weed can do it everyday and function, but drinking everyday? That would be crazy.
So what do we do with the people that are addicted to something like crack or whatever? Is there a cure? Rehab may get them off but they always seem to get back on. They just keep cycling the off and on drug lifestyle. I heard recently, that mushrooms could be used to "reset" the human mind, however I'm not sure if this was a study from years ago. higher yet safe amounts of mushrooms were thought to be used to cure addiction of many kinds. Again, I'm not sure what the details were on that. So don't go taking viscous amounts of shrooms to cure your addiction to Dungeons or Dragons or whatever your problem is. Just saying. Anyway the US restricts testing of these things so we'll never really know.

I need to stop to nap before work. Sorry this couldn't have been funnier. Wait, no I'm not.

Be cool,
Ross

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is

Okay, So to preface this, the writing you may or may not see for the next 30 days is part of this exercise to get me writing more. Specifically on random (does the fact that I said specific and random so close to each other make any sense?)topics without preparation of any kind to see what happens. For reading pleasure I will try as hard as I can to make a funny or two.

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is

Day 01 - My current relationship is a lack thereof... with other people that is. I engage in relations with myself a couple times per day. It's a great time. I'm always happy to see me. But seriously, my relationship status is single. It has been that way for a while. It is hard to say whether or not I am single because I suck at talking to women, which I do, or whether or not I'm just terrible at picking up on social cues from women. After typing that I may realize that it is perhaps a combination of both.

When talking to women especially to a new LAIDEE (if you didn't read that as if Jerry Lewis said it, go back and read it again accordingly), I really don't know what to say. I mean, aside from the polite "hello, how are you?" bullshit, I'm not sure what to say. For the most part I'm trying really hard not to say "I want to do you." Mainly because I'm sure that wouldn't work and I'm constantly trying too hard not to come across as a creep. That in itself may be creepy but whatever. So I feel like the less that I say, the better. But, that leaves me to seem uninteresting, which is something to avoid too. Who wants to even know someone that is uninteresting, you know? So aside from the polite "hi and bye" shit, my mind thinks of something Larry Davidesque about the current situation, which ends up being less creepy than "I want to do you" but stranger than nothing at all. An example of a Larry Davidesque comment to be made would be like "Ever notice that no matter how many napkins a restaurant gives you it's never enough?" or some stupid like that. To which there is no reply. It's a time like that I wish I could hear the other person's thoughts. I'm sure they are nothing short of hilarious. I'm also not one to talk about myself really. I think if you are a person that just goes on and on firing off your facecanon about what your favorite thing about yourself is or what you would do with a billion dollars, then you need to cut the ish. Nobody could ever be that interested in what you have to say. So, I avoid being too self absorbed as well.

So getting back on track let's discuss social cues. Touching. I'm not really a touchy type of guy. I enjoy my personal space, especially the elbow room. If anyone is touching me even in the slightest way I find it odd, well unless it's business time. In that case it's awesome and I say bring it on. But outside of that context, I find it off putting. Mainly because like I already said, I like my space, but I also find it a pompous thing to do. Maybe I didn't use the right word there. I don't know perfectly what pompous means, but I think people that just walk up and put an arm around you or grab your arm while telling you a story are taking too much liberty. What makes them think they can go around touching? I think if I ever pulled that I'd be in maced and cuffed in no time at all. Also, general talking. I'm never sure if someone is being polite or if they are actually interested. If a woman that I know gives a cheerful greeting, I'm not sure if it is just politeness or out of interest. Most of the time, I assume its politeness. I try not to make any amount of attention that I get from a LAIDEE (Jerry Lewis style, you should remember this if you are going to be reading other posts) a big deal. I feel like a creep would only do that. Again, avoiding the life of a creep. <--Should be my campaign slogan.

I'm going to throw in that I hardly ever meet anyone new. The pool of women that I know are just people that I know. Since they are who they are, people that I know, (I am Dr. Suess, cats out the bag) they have no longer become an option to pursue, at least that's they way I feel it should be. You can't know someone for years and then all of a sudden "Hey, let's go on a date" (or whatever the kids say these days). And if you meet a LAIDEE from friends I feel like its somewhat of a incestuous pursuit because they are part of the friends group. If I go to a bar, I will more than likely not go up to a LAIDEE (getting tired of this yet?) mainly because I fear the inevitable rejection. I mean, how awesome of an approach could I possibly make? (Revisit my inability to talk to women) There is something not so genuine about approaching a woman at a - anywhere really, location doesn't matter. Let's say for instance there is an attractive LAIDEE in the bar, her friend walks away and so you step up and complement her cowboy boots and matching silly hat, whether or not you are sincere or totally lying, your end game is getting into her cowboy pants (Booya). So, what's the deal? If a LAIDEE is reading this until now, could you please respond with your input on that? Like, I have to imagine, as a LAIDEE, you know all guys want to do you all of the time. So any interaction with a guy is this dance of obsurdity and about hiding the fact the he wants to do sex to you. What's the other side to this?

Have I exhausted all aspects of my singleness? For now, yes. I'd talk about online dating, but I'd be running into my stand up material, and I think it's cheap to force comedic material into conversation or writing. I feel guilty not giving you my all on the first day, but I should pace myself. It's going to be a long month.

So, for now, live slow and die hard.
Ross