The Wonders of Walgreens

So, if you read my first blog, or know what I am up to these days, then you would know that I work in Boston a couple of nights a week and since I work overnight, before going to work, I usually stock up on a few items at the Walgreen's across the street. For most people going to the store to get some stuff is a pretty regular thing but I assure you this Walgreen's is never a normal experience.

Before entering the store there is usually a few loitering bums or crackjunkies sitting outside asking you for money, in particular change. They seem to really like change. Now the bums/crackjunkies usually change up between a polite, complement-giving black bum, to a couple of young, wierdo crackjunkies. The polite black bum has given me such complements as "handsome," "nice glasses," and calling me a friend. Sometimes I don't even give him money and he just complements me. He has a real gift at buttering people up. He's probably the most charming bum around and much better than the others. Now, the heroine snorting crackheads on the other hand are rather obnoxious and say things that aren't even coherent except for "change." Now, I say couple because they are in fact a couple. I don't think that I have ever seen a younger couple like this out on the street before. If they kicked the crack rock, they could probably be functioning people with normal lives, especially the girl. Like, if she gave up the hard drugs, and she took a shower and put on normal clothes, she could probably be a human being. Women are much more marketable into bringing back into real life as I would imagine, right? Anyways, I hope they are saving money for showers soon so they can become people again, because that would be the first step into coming back into society. From there? Well, applying for a job would be the next step, or a library card. I have no idea. What do you do in that situation?

Okay, so I am in Walgreen's, and every person shopping there is stupid. Standing in line sometimes takes 10 minutes, not because the people behind the counter can't do their jobs right, it's usually because of the douches in line that don't know how to buy things. They have a real issue with giving money to the clerks. Now while that is happening, some dumbasses usually force their way through the wrong automatic door which is awesome to watch because the door doesn't really open they way that they want it to, and they are going full force when they could have used the door next to it with ease. It's like watching the ending to American Gladiators and the people have to choose which door to go through and hope a gladiator isn't there to ruin there day, it's the same struggle.

So I walk around for the items I want, usually a Coke, Amp, or a green tea and something like a Powerbar. All the while, this bag lady, is always in there. I don't think she works there, because she is never is uniform or wearing a name tag, but she is always there. She watches everyone shop with her googly eyes. She'll be "looking at you", but her eyes are elsewhere. She'll follow people around suspecting that they are stealing and she'll tell the employees who just say "don't worry (insert bag lady's name here)." They just brush her off because I'm pretty sure she's just a loitering, paranoid bag lady. Having her follow you around is just the most uncomfortable thing ever. She's like a terrible lingering odor that you just can't get away from you. Every turn you take she there. You could be in the first isle and run to the last one and she there. She's a true creep.

Now, every time I buy my Powerbar, they give me a coupon to put toward my next purchase of a Powerbar. I was never a fan of coupons, and it would seem pretty cool that you could hypothetically keep buying your Powerbar for a discounted rate every time you go in there, but that is not the case. After accumulating about five coupons in my backpack, I decided that if they were going to keep giving me these things, I'm just going to have to keep giving them back. I just didn't want anymore of these to end up in my backpack. I just wouldn't have it. So one day I pulled up to the register and hand them my coupon and wouldn't you know that it doesn't work. None of them work. I didn't care, I just told them to ring me up without it because it doesn't matter that I save fifty cents on a Powerbar, I just didn't want the coupons anymore. After I buy my shit, I try and leave and the guy asks me if I want my coupon. Normally I would have taken it and thrown it in the backpack, but I couldn't believe this guy was serious. So I said, "Didn't we just go over this? They don't work, remember? Why would I want a coupon that doesn't work?" He was a younger guy and he saw the humor in this so we both laughed it off, but really Walreen's guy?

I guess that it's not news that a Walgreen's has some sketchy people lurking around there, but because of a large request to hear about my experiences there, I had to post about it. I am not sure what me next post will be about but, hopefully that will come in the next few days. If you have any ideas, lay them on me. Until next time, snooch to the nooch.